Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (1989)
Two high school friends in a band must go back in time to collect historical figures in order to graduate.
Rufus welcomes the viewer to the future of San Dimas, California in 2688, which is a utopia. He continues that 700 years ago the Great Ones ran into a problem that he had to help them out with.
In San Dimas, California in 1988, Ted "Theodore" Logan and Bill S. Preston are practicing when they blow out one of their speakers. Bill tells Ted that he doesn't think the Wyld Stallyns will make it as a band without Eddie Van Halen on guitar, while Ted doesn't think they will get Eddie Van Halen to join their band until they get a triumphant video. Bill realizes they are late to school and they go to San Dimas High School where Mr. Ryan is quizzing Bill and Ted about historical figures. After class Mr. Ryan tells Bill and Ted that unless they get an A+ on their upcoming oral report, then he is going to fail them. Bill reads the assignment instructions where they are supposed to express to the class how important historical figures from different time periods would view the world of San Dimas in 1988. Missy/Mom drives up and offers them a ride. She drops off Ted so he can get his books and when Ted goes inside his house, Captain Logan is looking for his keys. Logan tells Ted that he spoke with his principle who told him Ted is failing history and threatens that if Ted flunks out of school, he will have to go to Oates Military Academy in Alaska. The Three Most Important People in the World tell Rufus that it is time for him to help Bill and Ted and send him back in time in a modified telephone booth.
While Bill and Ted are studying, Missy/Mom brings them food. Mr. Preston walks into Bill's room and kicks him out so he can have sex with Missy/Mom. They go to Circle K and Ted asks Store Clerk when the Mongols ruled China, but Store Clerk doesn't know. Rufus lands in the telephone booth and tells them that he is there to help them with their history report. Another telephone booth arrives with Bill and Ted from the future. They tell current Bill and Ted to trust Rufus and to give their love to the princesses before they leave. They get into Rufus' telephone booth and he takes them to Austria in 1805. Napoleon happens to see them and orders them to be blown up, but a cannon blast hits near him and he is transported along with them when they travel in the circuits of history. Rufus takes them back to the current time and shows them the Circuits of Time Directory and then leaves in the phone booth. Another phone booth appears and they find Napoleon and bring him into Ted's house. They ask Deacon to watch Napoleon while they search for other historical figures. Logan stops Ted from leaving and Bill crank calls Logan and tells him his keys were found at the station. Bill and Ted travel to New Mexico in 1879 landing next to an outhouse. They get out and say hello to a local, who runs away. They walk into a bar and order two beers from the Bartender. Billy the Kid walks into the bar and asks for people to play cards with him. Bill, Ted and Billy play a poker game with Bearded Cowboy, and Old West Ugly Dude and Bill exclaims loudly when he gets three aces. Bearded Cowboy and Old West Ugly Dude figure out Billy is cheating and a sight breaks out. Bill and Ted are beaten up by Old West Ugly Dude, Bearded Cowboy, Tatooed Cowboy and his friends, but are saved by Billy.
They make it back to the phone booth and travel to Athens, Greece in 410 B.C. Socrates is giving a lecture to his students on how their lives are specks of dust falling through the fingers of time when Bill and Ted walk up to him and Bill introduces himself and Ted to Socrates. They tell Socrates that all they are is dust in the wind and then kidnap him. They then arrive in England in the 15th century. They ask John the Serf if he knows where any personages of historical significance are and he points at the castle of King Henry. Bill and Ted see Princess Joanna and Princess Elizabeth on the balcony of the castle. They sneak into the castle and while they are play sword fighting wearing armor, Ted falls down the stairs. Bill sees a guard stab the armor Ted was wearing and then checks on him. The guard attacks Bill, but he and Ted knock him unconscious and Ted tells him he fell out of the armor as he was falling down the stairs. They find Joanna and Elizabeth and introduce themselves, but they are forced to hide when Evil Duke calls out to Joanna and Elizabeth. Joanna and Elizabeth ask Bill and Ted to help them escape from their upcoming forced marriages, but Bill and Ted are captured. The Evil Duke sentences them to be hanged and as they kneel in front of the chopping block, John the Serf rides by in a wagon hauling the telephone booth and calls them heretics and witches. Billy and Socrates, who are disguised as the executioners, free Bill and Ted and they all flee in the telephone booth.
They travel to the hall of The Three Most Important People in the World who greet them by air guitaring. Bill and Ted get back into the phone booth and travel again. Stupid Waiter and Ugly Waiter bring a Ziggy Pig to the table of Deacon, Napoleon and Kerry and Daphne. Napoleon eats it all by himself and is awarded a Ziggy Piggy button by Stupid Waiter and Ugly Waiter. Bill, Ted and the others arrive in Vienna, Austria in 1901 and kidnap Freud, followed by Kassel, Germany in 1810, where they kidnap Beethoven during one of his performances. They travel to Orleans, France in 1429 and take Joan of Arc with them and then go to Outer Mongolia in 1209 where they entice Genghis Khan to join them with a Twinkie. They then travel to Washington, D.C. in 1863 where they kidnap Abraham Lincoln. While they are traveling, they notice the antenna is broken. Deacon takes Napoleon bowling, and Napoleon gets upset when a fellow Bowler tries to go at the same time. Deacon, Kerry and Daphne leave Napoleon behind when they catch him cheating. As Napoleon is trying to leave, Bowling Alley Manager tells him that he still has to pay for his game and then throws Napoleon out when he can't pay. In San Dimas in 1,000,000 B.C., Bill and Ted manage to fix the antenna with chewing gum and pudding cans and take off in front of Neanderthal 1 and Neanderthal 2.
They land back at the Circle K where they first met Rufus and gave advice to their now past selves and then travel to San Dimas in the future for their exam. Missy/Mom makes Bill do his chores and he with the help of Ted and the historical figures finish them all. Afterwards they go to the San Dimas Mall. While at their school, Student Speaker is giving a talk on how our society is like Marie Antoinette's except instead of saying let them eat cake, she might say, let them eat fast food. Bill and Ted leave the historical figures at the food court while they look for Napoleon. They talk to Deacon who tells them that he ditched Napoleon. They guess Napoleon must have gone to Waterloo water park. Mother at Waterslides is buying tickets for her children when Napoleon sneaks into the park. Napoleon is at first hesitant to go into the water slide and Waterslide Attendant tells him that he is holding up the line and pushes him in. Napoleon enjoys the slide and starts cutting in front of children to go over and over again until Bill and Ted find him and take him with them. Aerobic Saleswoman is advertising the New Nautilus system while Aerobic Instructor leads a workout at the mall. Beethoven is looking at the piano's when Music Store Salesman asks him if he is a musician. The Music Store Salesman turns on the electric piano and Beethoven excitedly laughs.
Billy and Socrates see two women eating at the food court and try and flirt with them. Freud walks over and also tries to flirt and Girl at Mall calls him a geek and she and her friend get up and leave. Genghis Khan goes to the Sporting Goods store and arms himself with a baseball bat. Security Guard sees him using it against a mannequin and calls for backup. Lincoln gets his photo taken by Mall Photographer who then demands his costume back. Lincolns pushes him and runs away. Joan pushes Aerobic Instructor and starts trying to lead the class. Eventually all the historical figures are arrested and brought to the Los Angeles County Sheriff, San Dimas Station. Police Psychiatrist starts questioning Freud and Freud in turn, asks him about his mother. Logan then questions Lincoln. Ox gives a presentation on how things are more moderner, bigger yet smaller and ends it with San Dimas High School Football rules! He is then cheered on by Randolf, Buffy, Jody and the rest of the seniors. Missy/Mom drops off Bill and Ted while Napoleon waits in the car. Ted finds out the historical figures have been locked in jail and he and Bill decide that after the report, to go back in time to steal Logan's keys and then put them in the bush where they find them. Bill and Ted manage to rescue the historical figures and drive back to their school. Randolf gives his report in which he thinks Abraham Lincoln would be impressed with San Dimas, as he is. Mr. Ryan tells the student that he, along with Mr. Ward and Mrs. Rowe thought their reports were entertaining and informative. Bill and Ted give their report where each historical figure gives a speech culminating in Lincoln's speech to be excellent to each other and party on dude. Bill and Ted then leave in the telephone booth to return the historical figures.
Later, Bill and Ted are practicing when Ted notices that nothing has really changed in their lives. Rufus shows up with Joanna and Elizabeth who join the band and as Bill, Ted, Joanna and Elizabeth play, Rufus promises that in time, they do get better.